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  • Eve Coker, PhD, LCMHC

Baby Steps = Lurching into the unknown?

We often remind each other to take "baby steps" whenever we undergo a process, such as in personal development, growing a business, or nurturing a relationship. The message in this case is that we build upon small successes, and not to beat ourselves up for not being able to take huge leaps or accomplish unrealistic goals - and trying to figure out how not to hold ourselves to unrealistic goals in the first place. These are all great points! I can't tell you how many clients (all of us, really) beat themselves up because they think they should be able to


But as a popular meme around the internet points out, babies don't always take tiny, cautious little steps. Sometimes they run full force into things, and they will travel as far as they can as soon as someone is no longer watching. They explore into the unknown. They still don't go as far or as fast as a grown adult - but for them, they have the opportunity to continue growing and exploring something new, with or without the support that they need. Sure, those steps look tiny, but they're a foray into a whole new world. With every step, the child becomes more proficient with their exploration and growth process - learning more about where they want to go and how they want to get there. Just like any process.


So the term "baby steps" has a similar context: Those steps may look small, but they're all part of an important foray into the unknown and carving out your path. We've become accustomed to feeling like the steps are not enough, especially when others want unreasonable things from us, lead us to feel like we're never enough, or project an image of impossible gain (that they were able to get with wealth and privilege) that we compare ourselves to.


We all move at our own pace, and the process of building upon our journey is more useful and powerful than trying to leap to the other side of our journey.




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